We all struggle

Struggle…

 

 

Weight loss and eating properly is a constant struggle, much like any other habit, eating poorly or just eating in general I believe becomes an addiction. I am not talking about the disorder type of addiction where you binge, that is a totally different story. But more just that you’re off work, you’re running late and you have all of these food options and the only thing that sounds good in your head is junk. Whoppers, Big Macs, 5 guys, Andy’s Cheesesteaks, all of these only take a second to order and they taste so good. You work hard all day so why shouldn’t you be able to eat what you want? Why should you struggle with guilt for doing something nice for yourself? STOP IT!!

 

I bet you were almost agreeing with me, I bet you were almost feeling sorry… because it is an addiction. Let’s redefine “doing something nice for yourself.”  Is feeding a mindset that has made you uncomfortable what you put on your shoes being nice to yourself? What about feeding the thoughts that help you fail and make you feel worse about yourself? Are those things really being nice to yourself? No, I really don’t think so.

 

So now you’re out… it’s early in the morning and you’re getting your cup of coffee to start your day. Your favorite coffee is surrounded by all these sweet sugary easy to eat doughnuts and muffins, and then the bagels and the cream cheese and all these things are just seconds away. It’s a hard fight… the smell… the pictures… you walk in the door and even if you have already eaten your stomach tells you, “Hey we got some room in here… I am not full… Put more in here…” Think of your stomach like the best player on your sports team, no matter what he wants in the game. No, a bad coach will play him/her until they fall out just to win the moment… but a good coach knows that to keep that player healthy they need to rest, to practice, to do the right things to prevent injury. So why listen to that stomach when it is yelling to be worked? It wants to work no matter what. Sometimes you can be full and it still says hey unbutton your pants we got room for a few more bites. That is the addiction… the need to eat… it’s a tough mindset to be in, it just plain sucks.

 

No I am not saying not to eat, but don’t give in to the easy, quick methods that society has led us to. We are the now generation… fast food… buffets… heck we even are able to microwave our veggies with the cheese sauce oozing off of it already. Make better choices to be able to make choices longer. Quantity is not quality… if it were well I would be in great shape lol.

 

Fight the temptation… don’t lie to yourself… do not say, “Hmmm… if I grab two of these donuts it’s ok, I am going to go walk for 30 min after work and it will even out.”  That is a lie… a lot of people do not know that their exercise is making them fat… we over value what we do and then feel good about eating more because we worked out. I mean I walked when I would have been watching TV… that earns me a few donuts right?? HELLL NO!!! Sorry… lol just trying to make a point. Let’s say you walk a moderate pace 3.5 miles an hour and you can walk a mile in about 17 min. so in 30 min you will almost have 2 miles down… wow sounds better and better… I mean walk a mile for a doughnut sounds good to me… no… no… and no again. At 3.5 miles an hour you’re only burning roughly 180 cal. depending on your weight it will be different. At about 150 lbs you burn about 130 cal and at 300 lbs you burn 270 cal.  Your average glazed doughnut is 260 cal. Boston cream about 310 cal. Chocolate cake doughnut a whopping 550 cal. So you’re trying to lose weight… you feel awesome about walking your 30 min and you want to reward yourself and you eat in 2 chocolate doughnuts roughly 5 times what you burned off.  And the thing is you feel great about it and think you’re really doing something. Then you get upset when at the end of the week you weigh yourself and you have gained weight. Imagine if you did this 3 times a week. That is 1100 cal without all the rest of your meals. And that is just 2 small doughnuts.

Exercise is important for a healthy body, but the most important thing for weight loss is watching what you put in your mouth. No listening to your stomach when you know you have eaten properly and it tells you… hey after dinner we will walk to the corner and back to let the food settle you can have one more serving on Mac-n-cheese. Which is made so it tastes good with real milk and butter a small 1 cup serving has 410 cal? One cup is like what 4 spoonfuls? Really? 100 cal a spoon full and that walk to the corner that probably never happened would not touch the 410 cal you put in your mouth. If you actually measure it out and only get a cup full… cause we all know that a heaping serving spoon full is about a cup right?? Oh and you have to go back in to get the few pieces that fall off which ends up being another half a serving spoon full.

 

Look I said all of this because I go through this every day… ok no that is wrong… I go through this every second of everyday. I got my coffee this morning, large ice coffee, black, with a turbo shot. I know there are no cal there… so why not have the hash rounds?  Which are 200 cal. Because I really don’t need them. It’s a constant battle all day every day and it sucks.

 

I guess I am writing this to get it out and to feel better… maybe to make other people know that ok you’re not alone, everyone (almost) who is trying to lose weight is sort of going through the same exact thing.

 

  Watch what you put in your mouth…. And get a heart rate monitor to help you count cal. It is really the most effective way to know. Even at a higher weight everyone’s fitness level is different. Your heart rate is the best indicator to how many cal you’re burning. Learn to not over value your work out… that super supreme pizza is not a 5 min bike ride and a few laps in a pool… each slice of that beast is 310 cal.

 

Keep your head up; if you know you’re weak avoid the places that make you feel that way. If your friends and even family don’t get it and don’t help… don’t eat with them. And when they after a month wonder why, (only after commenting on how good you look) point out that they are not good for your eating habits and you only look that good cause you avoided them during feeding time. It’s harsh and it is hard but sometimes you have to surround yourself with people that get it.

 

  This was long enough and so not what I started out thinking this was going to be lol I hope you enjoyed it.

 

  Smile… anything that makes you feel good makes you want to move and that will always burn more cal than sitting on the couch with a frown.

Wait Staff…

Wait staff …

 

Ok, so I was out eating dinner this weekend and I had some of the best service I have had in a long time. The place in which I ate was a bit confusing.  I guess the waitress was not the one to take the food order just the drink order and she was only there in part to answer questions. A different person the chef/cook I guess came out and took the order.  I only say that because he never really told us who he was other than his name which I do not remember.  When he brought the food out he dropped it off and turned and walked away. Not waiting to see if it was done properly or not. The whole this was a bit confusing to be honest.

 

But the waitress was great, extremely helpful and polite, very eager to help us with anything we wanted. Checking on different drinks to make sure the bar could make them then making sure it tasted right because until they looked it up no one had ever heard of it before. She even told us a joke and what made the joke so funny was the fact that she was extremely tickled (yeah I have lived in the South too long) by it and she herself could not stop laughing.

 

  “What did the stop light say to the car?” Wait for it … Wait for it … “Don’t look I am changing!”

 

Yes I know you just rolled your eyes, but watching someone else tell it that could not stop giggling made it really funny.

 

Then we got to the desert portion of the dinner which I almost never get with me trying to lose weight … but I had only eaten one other meal that day with me being so busy, so I had a little extra room on a cal count. I guess the servers here make the desert plates up themselves; she got super excited telling us how pretty she would make it and how good they were. When I ordered it she even clapped her hands and said “yay” and zoomed off like a little kid who gets to make something cool for mom and dad. It was actually fun to watch. And honestly she made the place worth coming back to. I mean the food was not bad … but it was not mind blowing, the salad bar that everyone raved about was well, just ok in my mind … the second person taking our order was a bit confusing at first and the menu was very limited. But after all it was a steak house and I was there for steak so what else would I really want lol. But had I taken my kids I would have been hard pressed leaving there without spending too much.

 

I think what a lot of managers and people who run places in the food industry have lost sight of over the years is that a server or your wait staff is honestly a touch more important than anyone else in the building. I would even have to say more important than your chef or line cook. I mean honestly, could any amount of good food overcome really bad service? If the server is just rude and sloppy and all things bad the food would have to be out of this world to make up for it … but that is only if that bad server gets the order correct. Managers … well they are the easiest person in the building to replace.  A good manager will know who to hire and who to put where, they will know who does what job the best, and will be able to put aside personal feelings and be able to get the job done. But even a good manager comping your food and not making you pay for anything will not always make up for a crappy server.

 

But a server … a good server can make up for a long wait, and can pick up the slack with bad management. They can make a not so great meal just a little better with honesty and entertainment value. A good server can help with a crying child, help you decide what you want when you hard pressed to figure it out, and a good server will be friends with the cook, the manager and the bartender.  So if you’re having a really bad visit the server can make sure that in some form or fashion it is made up to you. And normally they are the lowest paid people in the building. I am not sure what it is where you guys are but here most servers get paid is about $2.13 an hour plus tips … and well, not everyone tips accordingly. Now don’t get me wrong, unless the place is really crappy or the server just plain stinks then they do not make out too bad. But there is something else to consider that not a lot of people know.

 

Business being what it is has found ways of cutting corners and rounding off the edges in a way that optimizes profits in a way that keeps overhead low. In most places head count or your on-the-clock-employee is the largest drain on your money.  So why would you have a dishwasher come in early to help set up whom on the hour makes five or six more dollars an hour than your server?  So a lot of places have servers come in to roll silverware, clean and dust, scrape gum from under tables, fix salads ahead of time, stock salad bars, help with prep work and inventory. All of these things being done at $2.13 an hour.

 

Now there is just a little more to consider here.  Another way that businesses have decided to cut their costs is to dip into the pockets of the servers.  At the end of the night in a lot of places the server will have to tip out their bartender, bus boy, and host. The business does this with the mindset that all of these people did some work for that customer and are entitled to part of the tip. That is what is said, the truth is that by doing this the company can tell us that as an incentive to pay the bartender normally around three to four dollars an hour. And bus boys and hosts just barely minimum wage. Now this tip out is not a percentage of what the server makes but a percentage of their total sales and bar drinks. Now for the bar they normally only make them tip out a percentage of the bar tab not the total bill. But the others are a flat percent. Some places even make servers pool tips so that at the end of the night everyone gets roughly the same.  Slackers can sit back on their smoke breaks and do little while others hustle and make everyone else the money.

 

So just a thought, next time you’re out and you’re at a place be aware of how hard your server is working, and understand exactly what they have to deal with too. I know the price of meals can be crazy at times, but servers really look out for people that look out for them.

 

Smile … you should always smile at the person bringing you your food … I mean really, do you want to take a chance?

Weight loss…

Weight loss…    

 

Well I am getting furry… only 18 days into my beard challenge and so much has happened. I have gone to Ohio, gotten as boat from my father, celebrated mother’s day; all of these things include food. I know what you’re thinking… excuses… excuses… yeah you’re right. But on a good note I did still lose 1 pound this week at my weigh in so at least it is going down.

 

I have walked a little and still have yet to get on my bike. Something in my knee is giving me fits and running through my front yard like a 7 year old with a kite in my hand did not help at all. But it was so much fun.

 

There is a bike ride the second weekend of next month, I may attempt to break in my legs there and ride a slow 50 miles. That would be a good start to my challenge I really do need to get moving on the cycling though. I have a long way to go in a short time.

 

Other than all that life marches on… teenage children are just that… teenage children. They believe their world is going to end one second and then get distracted by something and just like a switch, poof they are better and looking in a different direction.

 

I have many projects planned that I will be able to share in the near future… putting up a cheap pool, working on a workout space in my garage, putting up a punching bag for those rough days at work, extending my firepit, re-screening my back deck… the list goes on and on. But being outside and moving around are great! Better than sitting!

 

If anyone has any projects share em with me leave me a comment or something, I will check em out and maybe you will give me an idea or two…

 

 

  Smile… it’s better to smile as you leave an elevator you have passed gas in… then to be the person frowning as they enter it only realizing it as the doors close.

Going Dark…

Going dark…      

 

  You know what they say about it… once you do it you never go back… that is kind of what I am hoping. If you did not get my humor in that first line its ok… just a play on my title… if you got it and found it not so funny?? Well loosen up your probably to uptight.

 

  Going Dark according to the urban dictionary:

 

3.	Going Dark
	To remove one’s self from all social media outlets and otherwise make oneself unavailable for contacting. Typically done in order to be more productive.

 

  Now am I going to remove myself from social media all together? No… but I have been doing a lot of thinking. When I go out to eat and I look around me I see more and more people only half listening to the person across from them as they check their phone… facebook… or whatever else they can pull up. I remember a time when we were not so connected, but more connected. I mean I knew peoples phone numbers… the operator on the phone spoke the same language that I did… when I called a company for help I got Joe Smith who knew there was a storm in my area. An honest to god, personal connection…

 

Now before you go getting your panties in a bunch, I love the internet and all it does for me… the blog you’re reading right now for instance. I have met so many wonderful people from all over the world and we keep in touch, some of which on a daily basis through *gasp* email. So I am not saying I am going to shun all form of electronic communication. I am not going to put on a tin foil hat and move to the mountains with my dog Jeb and learn how to make rabbit snares. All I am saying is that I am going to use these things for which they were intended. To keep in touch with people I normally cannot… but not live my life in an internet world. Were I do not know what time it is or where I want to call off of work because I almost beat the guy on a facebook app game and I just need more time.

 

So connected we are disconnected… I know my grandmothers phone number by heart… I have known it since kindergarten. But if you ask me my mom’s home number… my brother’s phone number… hell my kid’s cell phone number… I could not tell you without really thinking hard about it. I mean why should I? I have this cool contact with their picture that plays a song that reminds me of them with their birthdates and their email and it reminds me when to text them to tell them happy birthday I have all of that at the tip of my finger… why remember anything? My phone will give me step by step directions to their houses but I bet half the kids in the US cannot read a map… why should they? I mean really we have GPS and I mean it’s never gotten anyone lost has it?? *snicker* (don’t get me started on GPS <getting people shot>)

 

So I know I am rambling… if you knew me in person you would know that is how I work… I have had some of my best ideas right in the middle of a broken train of thought lol.

 

  So I am partially going black I think… blacking out a lot of my facebook stuff because I really don’t have time to keep up with it. I will keep it though so that I can promote the blog and my cycling activities. But I want to spend less time on the computer and on the phone and more time with people… and my dog.

 

2 or 3 days ago I was in a local store picking up stuff for the house, I looked over saw something and the kid in me started getting excited. So I bought it and went home. After we put things away and ate and all that I put it together and went outside. My kids were looking at me like a dog does when it hears a strange noise. Everyone trying to figure out what and why I was doing, I took my Green Lantern kite outside in my front yard and for about 30 min I was 7 years old again. My daughter went outside and wanted to help and my son stood there making faces and talking to his girlfriend on the phone. But we were all outside for 30 min. Had I not bought that kite… I would have sat down at my computer, checked; facebook, craigslist, email, facebook, blog, facebook, and then watched TV. Instead I had a blast! My kids had fun, my wife even stopped doing stuff inside for a few min to come out on the front porch and shake her head at me before going inside. But that was so much more fun that sitting at a computer trying to remember what I was going to type in the search box that seemed so important.

 

  So yeah I know this was all over the place… but it is what it is… I am what I am… but we are only what we make ourselves… I refuse to be assimilated.

 

 

  Smile… people who are actually looking at you and not their phones deserve that much

Anti-Social Network…

 Anti-Social network…

 

 

  I have taken a bit of a breather from any big social networking stuff and my blog. I guess I needed to step away and disconnect a little bit. Take a breather from all the 000 111 of the internet.

 

Recently we had a huge vote in our state that involved a hot topic, and our state actually got national attention because of this. I stayed up late to watch as all the votes come in, and as I networked my but off on Facebook and talked to all my like minded family and friends, I argued, fought with, and yelled at those on my “friends” list that did not agree with me. I mean come on we all know I am right and the whole world is wrong unless you happen to agree with what I say… after all I am great in mind… body… soul… ok ok maybe great in body only because of my girth… only great in mind because my mind is a reflection of my friends and other who have taught me many things over my short (or not so short) lifetime… and great in soul because I have been touched so deeply many times by the love and compassion of others. But wait a second… I have been touched by love and compassion but I argued and actually called people a fool and heartless and many many more things for not seeing things just as I did? That is not love and it sure is not compassion… I was yelling at people for not having the same thing I was not giving them. Did I still think I was right? Of course I do… but how exactly can you yell at someone and call them stupid or a bigot and tell them they should love as you do? Hummm…. Kinda makes you think a little… who was the hypocrite there?

 

I am not making this blog a political platform… I absolutely refuse to do that. My friends, my family, my co-workers, and all the rest of the people I have been blessed with knowing in my life are as diverse as any group you will ever meet. It’s in their diversity that I find my home, because my likes and the things I find passion in are so different that it takes a team no… an army of diversity to keep me occupied. So with that said how can I alienate these people? How can I call someone out and tell them that opinion is wrong? That only mine is right… that they are taking someone else’s freedom away while I am trying to take away theirs?

 

Does that mean I have to give over and not believe in what I believe? No… but on the other hand in the end you have to agree to disagree. We live in a semi free country where great men and women die for things they believe in all the time. Democracy although skewed at times is the best way to get things across… although it can be bloody and a long and hard road… slavery… women’s rights… things like this did not happen overnight and they did not get reversed overnight. And in many cases still have to fight to keep equal rights.

 

Social networks have made it so easy to reach out and connect with people all the time… smart phones keep you connectected 24 hours a day. We have been assimilated (star trek reference and yes I am a dork that is another fork in my diverse tree). But with this social net work we have lost our filters and we have lost some of our common sense (here I am again telling people what they do and do not have… lol part of ego I guess… but I can live with that) the filter we have at work to not look over at someone and say, “you’re a complete idiot”. We do not have that on the network… I mean after all they are reading our pages are they not?? And if they publish something that we do not like… well they did make it public so I am free to say whatever I want… as long as I am behind my computer after all in the safety of my own home or internet café. But how dare they come to my post and call me out after all if they do not like what I have to say they do not have to read it… I mean really the nerve. It makes me laugh and I can say all these things because I have used these excuses and at the time I say no flaw in my thinking… I mean after all I am a supreme genius and one of the greatest minds of my time. Only a dolt would not agree…

 

The anti-social network has taken us from our neighborhood and into the online family we find on the World Wide Web. taken us away from going out to play until the street lights come on to playing on the computer all night until the street lights go out and wondering why we are to tired and function at work and school.

 

This is not really an anti internet rant… I mean I am posting the blog on the internet and even I being the supreme genius that I am, am not that much of a hypocrite But more or less my own thoughts about myself… the flaws I have seen in me. All of these things if you read this and it hits a nerve just remember they are flaws I see in me and know that you are not alone. We need to step away from ourselves from time to time to check ourselves. To see who we are hurting and who we are loving… and sometimes we can love something to death. I think a lot of ideas die because passion gets in the way of common sense… but who am I… what do I know… well yeah I know I am the supreme genius of my time… at least in my own head… or maybe that is just one of my voices who knows.

 

If you actually read this to the end and you followed it and understood it I suggest you see a doctor and get medicated as fast as you can… 🙂 happy anti-social networking everyone…

 

  Smile… maybe if you smile hard enough it will come out in your texts, ims, and emails. 🙂

 

Ol’ Blue

Butterflies…

 

 I have not blogged about this really but I am getting my father’s boat… for me I think it is more than just a boat. It’s going to be part of my dad, no he did not build it, nor did he buy it new, but for me it does not matter. This could effectively be the last summer I have to do a whole lot with my son with his thoughts of the military looming, and a few of my best memories are of being on the lake with my dad.

 

 As a kid you don’t respect what you’re doing or appreciate it, it is only looking back that you really miss it. And fishing on Lake Erie with my dad was one of those things.

 

 He has said he would come down and visit us from time to time so I think having the boat here and docked in a slip for easy access it will be great to be able to take him out in it and show him around our waterways here much like he did for me.

 

 I really don’t know what I wanted this blog to be about, all I know is the boat is getting unloaded today, I will be there to watch then do it and to see it out of the water for the first time. After talking to my family we have decided to re-name the boat… I know what you’re thinking but I have looked into this and the boat has changed owners and there is a little ceremony you can do and it will be fine… other than that I believe I am one of the luckiest people I know. The man who bought the boat new more than 30 years ago named it “Ark & Animals” dad never changed it and just let it stay… I talked to him about that and he has no attachment to that name he just said he never got around to changing it… so I will.

 

  My Fathers nickname is “Blue” it’s a long story so I will just say that I have decided the boat will now be named:

 

  Ol’ Blue

  Est. 1949

 

 Out of respect for the man I got the boat from.

 

  Thank you for reading this… I appreciate everyone who takes the time and I am glad I am able to share this with you.

 

 

  Smile… a memory is a snapshot of the past enjoy them… cherish them… then create some for the loved ones in your life.